welcome to settlement

heres an opinion

i have a horrible view of myself. like i struggle with self image and what not.
i'm so sick of worrying that i'm not "woman enough" for a guy, or whatever the heck i think.
like i'm not pretty enough, or i'm not classy or athletic, i've even thought of...God forbid; i'm not funny enough. i actually used to tell God that i felt sorry for the guy who got "stuck" with me or the one had to "settlle" with me.

i realize that it's all the devil, and i was stupid.but i got a new view. i may never have complete confidence. i may never get over all my insecurities; i'm only human. so i may have to live with not always feeling beautiful. but i can almost use that to my advantage!
go figure.
listen.
in a way, my thinking is right; a guy will be settling when he ends up with me.
we all desire perfection in our "partner", but thats impossible.
we are all human.
i have such high expectations for the man thats going to be in my life. like, i almost imagine him as perfect. big shocker here...he wont be. so in that aspect; i'll be settling.
i KNOW noone is perfect, i'm not stupid; but i think secretely deep down i hope my mr. right will be the single exception.

okay. thats about all.
i don't suggest you start to lower your standards
and this isn't some excuse to hate yourself.i'm not even saying it's okay to look down upon yourself. NEVER think less of yourself.
but even in the horror insecurities have hope. because it's a big world. you're not alone. when some major hottie ends up with some other major hottie it's not perfect....she will never be perfect.neither will he. oh look, it's almost like they will settle for second best (just not actually)
glory!

but for now. none of this REALLY matters to me. well obviously it does; becuase i'm talking about it. but theres so so much more to life