this is whats up

so, i'm super sick. i just feel like junk. i'm not one of those "faith healers" like i  think that no matter how much i say i'm fine, i'm not sick, i'll beat this thang;that i'll still be sick. i wont actually get better because of it. maybe it'll give me brighter spirits. but thats not where healing comes from. it's either  God, or the fact that my hot bod is just done being sick. so anyways. when i'm sick, i get all bummed out,and  i do a lot of sitting and listening and thinking. i do a lot of this often...but especially when i'm sick. stuff's gone down lately, and i know Father is faithful. Like, i'm stronger. my heart is stronger. ( i wish i knew i word better than stronger) anyways, it's all the makers deal. so He gets the credit.ask me sometime what he's been doing in my life. i bet you'll be surprised at how "strong" i'm getting :)

so anyways. this strength or whatever we want to call it; hasn't just come overnight. ohhhh lordy it's been a struggle, and it will be a struggle for a while longer. but anyways, i've been listening to my "oldie Father goldies". catchy i know. they're just the songs that had major impact on me. like worship songs or whatever. there is three of them. the lyrics are below...read. listen. have YOUR heart made stronger. i dare you. (number one and two alwayyyys make me cry)

I was dreaming of the holy city
I was wearing my wings
Then I looked up and saw a doorway to heaven
And I heard you calling me
Come up here, come up now
My beloved, my beloved
Come up here, come up now
My beloved, my beloved,
I wanna fly
like an eagle in the sky
I wanna fly
through that doorway in the sky
Here i come.
Don’t be afraid baby don’t you cry
Daddy’s here it will be all right
You’re not alone you’re not alone
Don’t be afraid when you’re cold at night
I will keep you warm I will hold you tight
You’re not alone you’re not alone
Look beyond the window there
To the sky above to the open air
Look beyond what you can see
Close your eyes and just believe
The lion roars and the lamb lays down
They live together in a whole new town
They’re calling me and they’re calling you
From the cold hard facts that we’re on our own
To the age old truth that we’re not alone
Don’t be afraid when you scrape your knee
I’ve got a band aide waiting and a kiss for free
You’re not alone you’re not alone
Don’t be afraid of your blind belief
Because the more you fly the more you’ll see
You’re not alone you’re not alone
Don’t be afraid little warrior bride
Your victory’s on the other side
You’re not alone you’re not alone

I'll Worship at Your Throne
Whisper my own love song
With all my heart I'll sing
For You my Dad and King
I'll live for all my days
To Put a smile on Your face
And when we finally meet
It'll be for eternity
And Oh how wide You open up Your arms
When I need Your love
And how far You would come
If ever I was lost
And You said that all You feel for me
Is undying love
That You showed me through the cross
I'll worship You my God
I'll worship You my God
I love You
I love You
Forever I will sing
Forever I will be with You
Be with You