“We all have the potential to fall in love a thousand times in our lifetime. It’s easy. The first girl I ever loved was someone I knew in sixth grade. Her name was Missy; we talked about horses. The last girl I love will be someone I haven’t even met yet, probably. They all count. But there are certain people you love who do something else; they define how you classify what love is supposed to feel like. These are the most important people in your life, and you’ll meet maybe four or five of these people over the span of 80 years. But there’s still one more tier to all this; there is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these loveable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else, and they’re often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really, want to love someone. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else”.
-Chuck Klosterman

old.old.old

father bear turns 48 tomorrow!
can you believe it? in writing, that seems so old. my dad is 48. comsidering the fact that he has a son who is 27; it's not all that old. but still. weird.
i wonder where i'm gonna be at 48.
Lord knows i wont have a 27 year old sun...not unless i get knocked up this year... (hopefully it's no goose baby!)
i realize it's completely crazy for me to think about where i'll be at 48 when i can't even see where i'll be at 20. but i'm excited.
i can't wait to grow old.

to celebrate....i give you the single song that contains my favourite male vocal of any song in the worlddd. (the first line damien sings....pure gold. i could listen again and again and again)

manchester orchestra

i can't stop listening to this band. lots of it is almost depressing; which i've been loving lately.
some of it also sounds like old bright eyes stuff. (which was flipping fantastic)

enjoy. (if possible)

you know who my best frend is...

oh boy. this took me back to my early highschool days.
I LOVED THIS SONG. actually the entire cd...
i wanted to marry marty sampson...obviously. he's a babe.
the backup dance girls are fantastic....same as the two guys in the back sharing a microphone...and the awkward swaying motions from everyone else.
i'll admit. worhip dvd's have come a long way.

Hey, are you lonely? 

Has summer gone so slowly? 

We found the ground, but that damage was done. 

It's cold as you fade into the sun. 

Where'd you go? To me? 

But you're alive! 

Well, it's only fallen frames, they told me. 

You stand out, it's so loud... and so what if it is. 

It's cold when you fade into the wind. 

Where'd it go to?

So what if you catch me, 

where would we land? 

In somebody's life forsaking his hands. 

Sing to me hope as she's thrown on the sand. 

All of your works are rated again. 

Where to go? 

But it's all wrong, you're so strong. 

But this life's work and choice took far too long. 

Where'd it go to?

You know I love you. 

You know I love you . 

I want you oh so much. 

It's so fair. 

When I was sure you'd follow through, 

My world was turned to blue. 

When you'd hide 

your songs would die, 

so I'd hide yours with mine. 

And all my words were bound to fall. 

I know you won't fail... 

see, I can tell...

if grace is an ocean; we're all sinking.

So, what a blessing when God steps in and corrects you!
Mind you, don't despise the discipline of Almighty God!
True, he wounds, but he also dresses the wound;
the same hand that hurts you, heals you.
From one disaster after another he delivers you;
no matter what the calamity, the evil can't touch you—

i've been slacking.
but it's because i haven't been too overly emotional....well thats a lie. i've been crazy weird lately. but it's nothing worth talking about. not on a blog at least.
i've been planning a trip to toronto....(with a stop in hamilton, of course) but i'm super stoked. i think i'm really going to like it there.
plus. i've been feeling independant lately. maybe thats the wrong word. maybe confident? not like arrogant. it's just been weird. i'm joking lots again. i'd stopped for a bit, because i thought life was just a big bummer. but i was so mistaken. i was holding things against people and letting things get to me. but thats just silly....not that things don't effect me. i'm just able to shrug it off and move on. maybe not "move on" but "get on"...are you confused yet?...i seem to be changing the subject lots..

heres a little ditty to boogie to. i hate how i love the worst songs.

sometimes people give you confidence.
maybe it's so wrong and twisted, but it's the truth.
tonight i went out in public with my hair up, and my bangs back.and i didn't feel ugly.
it may not sound like a huge deal, but for me it is. it's huge. my bangs cover my face, always. well...they did.
someone gave me confidence.
twisted., but i love it
thanks and goodbye

check out this concert. the bands quite good


when you get bored, this will cheer you up.

excuse the fact that it's HM, please. just listen

ah. i'm tired of being all emotional.
the first time i saw this scene i almost had a heart attack i was laughing so hard. i know the person i was with was embarrassed by me...but we don't talk about them anymore.
okay. the quality is horrid, but i think the beauty is still there.
ENJOY.

Scrub away my guilt,
soak out my sins in your laundry.
I know how bad I've been;
my sins are staring me down.

You're the One I've violated, and you've seen
it all, seen the full extent of my evil.
You have all the facts before you;
whatever you decide about me is fair.
I've been out of step with you for a long time,
in the wrong since before I was born.
What you're after is truth from the inside out.
Enter me, then; conceive a new, true life.

Soak me in your laundry and I'll come out clean,
scrub me and I'll have a snow-white life.
Tune me in to foot-tapping songs,
set these once-broken bones to dancing.
Don't look too close for blemishes,
give me a clean bill of health.
God, make a fresh start in me,
shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life.
Don't throw me out with the trash,
or fail to breathe holiness in me.
Bring me back from gray exile,
put a fresh wind in my sails!
Give me a job teaching rebels your ways
so the lost can find their way home.
Commute my death sentence, God, my salvation God,
and I'll sing anthems to your life-giving ways.
Unbutton my lips, dear God;
I'll let loose with your praise.

Going through the motions doesn't please you,
a flawless performance is nothing to you.
I learned God-worship
when my pride was shattered.
Heart-shattered lives ready for love
don't for a moment escape God's notice.

you never know what you've got till it's gone?

Sometimes you know what you have before it's gone. which makes losing it all the worse.

i wish i could post everything i feel. but we'd all be here forever

Superstitions aren't meant for lovers
Under covers, undiscovered is your skin
I am lonely, please let me in
You're probably wondering what I was proving
Are you choosing?
Am I losing you tonight?
Is it over, over?

Are we fading?

I never wanted anything the way that I want you
But my words don't seem to matter
My words don't seem to matter
And you look at me and I can see
The lies you're runing to
But my words don't seem to matter
I'd rather have you tested and true
Now you've had your chance
So let's try my way, it's my day
To show you what you're missing, turn around
And feel the winds of change upon your face again
The warm breath of your closest friend
I'm waiting, I'm waiting

Are we fading?

I'm scared we'll fall apart tonight
Under the moonlight
Under the moonlight
I'm scared we'll never make it right
Under the moonlight
Under the moonlight
Take my hand and hold it tight
Hold it tight

if kanye touches it, i'll love. (almost as much as lil wayne)

big effing gold star

the new metric cd is flipping fantastic. it's about time they had something new. so worth it.

i'm too lazy to post links or audio or anything...maybe another time.

the album is fantasies. just check it out

i'm sorry, i'm sorry.

i know the pussycat dolls are hardly what you want me to suggest you listen to. but this darn song. listening to it in english makes it more real...sort of

first we have the real song.

then we have what those sexy dolls "created" ( i throw the word "created" very loosley around when referring to this group)

some say tragedy is hard to get over, but sometimes the tragedy is that it's over

who would have thought....

the guy i once sort of had a crush, (who thinks i have a major crush on him) is talking up the guy i do sorta have a crush on; but who doesn't want to talk to me.

thrilling, i know

welikewelove