If it doesn't break your heart is it love?
No, if it doesn't break your heart it's not enough
It's when you're breaking down with your insides coming out
That's when you find out what your heart is made up of

I'll admit that i cry a lot. but i don't think i've ever cried at a random wedding.
but then i watched this video.
it's simply stunning.
soooooo beautiful.
really really shows love

green is the colour

i am going to talk about sports. but i'll never do it again. i promise.
i'm from Saskatchewan, i have no choice but to be upset about this all.

generally the 13th man is what makes the riders the best. obviously they have the best fans. it's a scientifically proven fact. they wear watermelons on their heads for pete's sake.
this time......they literally had a 13th man. which in the CFL blows it....because you can't. it's simple really.
for a second...when the clock hit 00:00 and the lumberjack creep Montreal man missed his kick i yelled. because i was sooo excited, i knew my boys could do it twice in three years! but then it just didn't happen.
i just pray it doesn't take them 17 more years to win again.

Ken Miller is the cutest coach i have ever seen. whenever i see his face, i just want to hug him. he reminds me of the grandpa, and i think i might love him
if i had the chance to meet coach miller i KNOW we would be friends.
Darian Durant can be the father to my unborn children anyday.

commmmmme on rider nation

I WOULD TOTALLY DO THIS!

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

change the world with passion stirred up within yourself. Not desire spoken from another.

your call

This song is the first song i remember falling in love with.
Actually in love.
i listened about 50000 times on repeat. i actually cried when i first heard it.
i stumbling upon the gooder way back in like 2004.....on myspace. (I KNOW! MYSPACE!...i'm really dating myself with that one)

how i longed to have someone say " i was born to tell you i love you"
oh my. it still gives me shivers.
heres the kicker. the guy....john....wrote it for his wife. at the time. that was just the most beautiful thing. i don't think they were yet married when he wrote it...(maybe i'm wrong)
wouldn't you love to have your soon to be husband sing these words to you? ....every breath you will take while sitting next to me will bring life to my deepest hope
good lord.
too bad they got a divorce.......(not ever kidding)

aliens? maybe crabs??

i can have resprct for Alexaner McQueen.
but really?
this is taking things way too far in my books.
the show itself is super.

but THE SHOES!!!!! OH MY GOSH

be still my raging heart. (and hormones)

tonight my heart was so torn.
like i haven't felt this passionate yet undecided about anything.
one second i'm actually in love with Edward. the next: jacob takes off his shirt...so i have to fall for him.
then edward speaks...so i'm passionately in love with him.



i hope i get clarity soon. i need to pick one, this indecisivness is getting ridiculous.

if i owned a club, this song would be the only song that played and everyone would love my club

myyyyyyyy life

i'm going with the latter of the two suggestions i just suggested in my last post.

here are some lyrics.

For those days we felt like a mistake,

Those times when love’s what you hate,

Somehow,

We keep marching on.

For those nights when I couldn’t be there,

I’ve made it harder to know that you know,

That somehow,

We’ll keep moving on.

There’s so many wars we fought,

There’s so many things we’re not,

But with what we have,

I promise you that,

We’re marching on

For all of the plans we’ve made,

There isn’t a flag I’d wave,

Don’t care if we bend,

I’d sink us to swim,

We’re marching on, .

For those doubts that swirl all around us,

For those lives that tear at the seams,

We know,

We’re not what we’ve seen,

For this dance we’ll move with each other.

There ain’t no other step than one foot,

Right in front of the other.

We’ll have the days we break,

And we’ll have the scars to prove it,

We’ll have the bonds that we save,

But we’ll have the heart not to lose it.

For all of the times we’ve stopped,

For all of the things I’m not.

we're marching on

We put one foot in front of the other,

We move like we ain’t got no other,

We go when we go,

We're marching on

ah heck, here is the song (sorry. the quality seems a bit grainy/off)

,

somehow we keep marchin on

the carpet cleaners are coming tomorrow, which really has nothing to do with anything; but because of this, i had to clean my room. like take stuff from under my bed and put it on top of my bed....so they can clean the carpet obviously. anyways, i found my "memory box"....maybe it's more appropriate if i say i found my "slap in the face box"

anyone have a memory box?

i strongly suggest you have one, but i also suggest you never look at the contents until you are old. and strong.

let me explain.

there are the obvious memories... concert tickets, random cards, things i bought for a memory that i will never ever use for anything....the odd cd cover (mainly the ones with poster that i'd never want to see in the garbage: hawk nelson...laguna beach...) i found my first credit card statement..HAHA that was depressing, because i've never seen a "balance owed" that low since. .but there are the not so obvious ones.... while i've never really had a "relationship", i've had relationships...like there has been guys in my life... apparently guys who like to write letters...give me photos and different things...since i'm such an emotion whore (NOT and emoitional whore..and emotion one) , i kept it all. i'm too young to have to read it all..see all the nice things guys will say before they "change there mind"...silly silly boys. it put A LOT of "what if" thoughts into my head. ha. i'm sure the universe wanted me married off to someone by now....oopsie.

i also have letters from friends. friends who were supposed to be in my life forever. best friends forever, right? it's sad how things always change. i think there is a phrase about how the only thing inevitable is change....sooooooo true. the people that had such a strong impact on my life two years ago are not even my facebook friends anymore, but the words they spoke and the truth they brought into my life are still impacting me.

okay...again, along the lines of slap in the face.....

i had some God stuff in there. some "dara shit" i guess you could say. the hopes and goals i had for myself both spiritual and lifestyle things. funny how what i once thought was so important over time fades into something not so important. actually, it's not funny at all. because it starts with something small, then suddenly i'm making excuses for everything. this really has nothing to do with anything important right now.

just don't lose sight of who you are. or who your are meant to be. who Father has destined for you to be. because losing sight of that changes everything.

sometimes i compare myself to other people. well, let me rephrase. sometimes i compare my life to other peoples lives. like i look at my steady, stable contentness and i wonder if it's wrong. i never want to have to roam the corners of the earth looking for happiness or satisfaction, i always want to find it where i am, with who i am. and i think so far i'm okay there. but sometimes...just sometimes...i look at other people and think maybe i've got it alllllllllllllll wrong. i suppose this is just typical doubt. maybe it's the devil? maybe it's just my sinful nature to want what i don't have.

i actually just took a break and was reading THE WORDDDDDD. i went to a section that one of my letters from my box told me to read.

anyways, i read a little bit from second timothy, it talks about doing your best for God, and not being ashamed of what you are doing. thats what i made it say anyways (sometimes i minipulate to see what i want to see)

so i guess that covers all the problems i was just having, yes? YES!

kind of along the same line... 'Marchin on' by one republic has become sort of my anthem...as of today! i'm glad it came into my life today. i needed it, crazy as it sounds.

i'm going to leave now. long posts are pointless. maybe i'll go read some more letters, live in the land of "what if" for just a little longer.

maybe i'll put it all behind me, lie on my bed and listen to my song on repeat until i sort out my current problems instead.

love. (duh)

if you want more love, why don't you say so

it's finally here.

NOVEMBER 17th!

sure it's only 12:05 am, but i've already purchased one republic and john mayer.

thank you, and goodnight.

You got a fast car But is it fast enough so we can fly away We gotta make a decision We leave tonight or live and die this way

i'm going to write a blog on this song soon.

but for now this is all.

corporate registries is kicking my butt

currently i am watching peak season, listening to bon iver and attempting to study for my exam tomorrow. (obviously the latter of the three isn't happening at this exact moment, but my books are open)

i don't like edmonton.

i've always had problems with it. but this trip i really am not in love. i know it's just a city, but i don't care. it has failed to leave a good impression on me, so i will leave unimpressed yet again. (obviously, since it didn't leave a good impression.....)

i was at starbucks tonight. all i wanted was a vanilla tea misto.

they origionally gave me the wrong size vanilla rooibos (which is my second least favourite item on the menu...second only to raspberry mocha frapps. YUCKKKKKY) normally i wouldn't complain, i would just take the drink and go..throwing it out and sucking it up. but i was with nicole tonight, and her drink was wrong too. so we asked for the right drinks. they ran out of earl grey tea for my drink. so i said they could use awake instead. she looked at me kinda funny, but made it. i got into the car and realized she gave me a rooibos awake tea. hahaha. i don't even know how this is possible. but it was not favorable to my tastebuds. poor poor tastebuds.

nicole and i were watching the aftershow last night. she turned to me and said "do you think Dan is gay?" my heart stopped. because i have thought this. but i really don't know, so i prefer to not think about it. it was so good to know that there are others out there who wonder the same thing, but who really don't know.

i'm going to U2. it's a pretty big deal, i know. it's not until june. but it'll be good.

my hair is grayer than ever. it's scarey sometimes i feel like some sort of freak, then i realize that if someone was going to think i was a freak, it wouldn't be because of my hair; it would be because of one of my other freakish qualities. then i remembered i'm cool, so i shouldn't worry. not even kidding.

thank the Lord.

okay.

i realize this is not going anywhere, and i really should study. i don't want to fail, i just want to pass, become certified for level two, get loads more money and do flipping corporate service. actually, i can do without doing the actual services, but the money will be nice.

Demi Lovato says

I tell everyone we got through

Because I’m so much better without you
But its just another pretty like a side break down
Every time you come around. Oh, oh…

So how do you get here under my skin
Swore that I’d never let you back in
Shoulda’ known better
Been tryin’ let you go cause here we go, go, go again
Hard as I try I know I cant quit
Something about you is so addicting
We’re falling together
You think that by now I know cause here we go, go, go again

She's pretty good, hey? haha

never forget this.

my hearts aches for you my God
my soul waits for you my God
I’ve come far to find you here
In this place will I draw near

and your spirit soars with me
to the highest heights
from where I’ll not look back
I’ll keep trusting you

for I know
you are faithful
my God

from the land of the barren
we will cry out for rain
fill our hearts God
I’ll keep trusting you

your spirit inside me holds me close

in your wonderful presence I let go
I cleanse my hands you burn my heart
I cry out for love you set me apart

for I know
you are faithful
my God

don't worry. God's got it.

i've said it before. but i'll say it again.

He's really really got it

comparable to the sun. (in hotness of course)

one night we took some photos.

a few turned out fantastic. sadly, most are horrid.

i'm posting a bit of both (majority are not-so-hot ones)

they make me laugh. a lot

(TOY SOLDIER, ANYONE??)

tell me what you want from here.

new one republic is out soon. i'm more excited for this than anything else in my life right now.

it's not that i'm that lame. i'm just really really excited!